The Ten Tests of Theatre

the trials and tribulations of London theatre goers 🙂 Because most of the theatres are really old, this stuff matters even more!


For me, theatre is “work” most of the time. I’m sitting there working out whether the seats are good value and also what to write about the show (easy if it’s good or bad, harder if it’s mediocre). So, I have a few things I do as a matter of habit, which help things along.

1) Smiles In View. Are the theatre staff happy in their work, or just there because it’s the closest they will get to a stage all year? The best want to chat to the audience, help them find their seats, and push off out of the auditorium once the show begins. The worst stare into the distance or chat among themselves (sometimes during the show) and pass the odd bitchy comment about what they are watching. Never good.

2) Chav Count. How many audience members are illegally taking photos before and during the show? Using…

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